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Beware, Zombies!

Happy Zombie Awareness Month! Now, I don’t know about you, but I love me some zombies. Well I should say that I love all horror movie creatures including vampires (and I don’t mean the kind that sparkle in the sunlight…vampires don’t sparkle! They burst into flames!), werewolves, and of course gremlins! But having a whole month dedicated to zombies is my kind of party!

Now the real question, what is your weapon of choice in the event of a Zombie Apocalypse and why? And does your weapon differ if we are talking fast zombies or slow zombies? Ahh the question of the century!

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Gabe: When the Zombie Apocalypse hits (yes, when) I will definitely be slow to react. I’m that guy who stays inside during a fire alarm until I’m absolutely certain that it’s necessary to leave. So if I DO have a chance to fight back, I’ll probably still be in my house, hopefully in the kitchen where there are passable weapons. Of those…I guess I’ll go for the frying pan. Easily accessible, and longer reach than a kitchen knife.

Now, on the off chance that I survive this first encounter, I’ll definitely be taking the double-tap advice of Jessie Eisenberg’s character from Zombieland. Slow or fast, I like my zombies double dead.
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Jess: My weapon of choice would definitely be a sword. While I like guns, there is only so much ammo you can carry around with you before you run out (and I don’t know about you, but I sure can’t make my own). So, definitely a sword. I can cut any zombies heads off swiftly and easily that way. Also, because it’s arm’s length (unlike a dagger or knife), I don’t have to get too close.

I think this would also work with ANY type of zombie. Whether fast or slow, no one can escape the cut of a swift blade. O:)

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Tom: While the classic zombie-killing instruments like the shotgun and chainsaw have their appeal, I’m going to mix up my mythologies and choose a lightsaber. Yeah I know, they’re not real-life thing, but then again, are zombies? Please don’t send me links to stories about real-life zombies in Haiti; I saw The Serpent and The Rainbow, I know.

Just think about the efficiency of a lightsaber in close quarters, when you’re surrounded by a mob of brain-eaters. Chainsaws have to work their way through a zombie’s body, and shotguns have to be pumped and reloaded. But a lightsaber can cleave through undead flesh like a hot knife through butter. In fact, give me that double-ended one like Darth Maul had, and watch how quickly rotten body parts pile up around my feet.
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Me: For slow zombies, I am definitely going with a baseball bat! It will never run out of ammo or get dull like a knife, plus I can stay a decent distance away when striking… Don’t want any zombies getting within biting range, if you know what I mean!

As for fast zombies, that is a little harder. I’d have to go with a machine gun full stocked with ammo (note to self, stock up before, not after zombie uprising). I prefer the blasting power of a shot gun, but having to reload constantly is not convenient when you’re hip deep in a swarm of zombies. Plus with all the ammo in a machine gun, I’m bound to hit some of them in the brainzzzz!

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